By Four days. Four days until graduation. The apartment is clean, the cap and gown are pressed, and I bought shoes — real shoes, black heels from Payless, $24.99, the first heels I've owned since prom. I practiced walking in them in the kitchen. Jayden watched me totter across the linoleum and said, "Mama fall down?" Not yet, buddy. Not yet. But the day is young and these shoes are optimistic.
Mama has been acting strange all week. She keeps asking me what time the ceremony starts (2 PM, Mama, I've told you six times). She keeps asking what I want for dinner afterward (anything, Mama, I don't care, just be there). She keeps calling Kevin to "make sure he's coming" — he's coming, he took leave, Crystal is coming too. She called Amber twice. She ironed a dress she hasn't worn in three years. Lorraine Mitchell is nervous. I've never seen Lorraine Mitchell nervous. She's nervous because her daughter is graduating from college and she doesn't know what to do with the pride because the pride is too big for her body and she's trying to press it into a dress she hasn't worn since 2014.
Tanisha and I had our last Waffle House study session on Wednesday. We didn't study. We sat in our booth — THE booth, the one by the window, the one we've occupied every Wednesday night for two years — and we drank coffee and we didn't say much. She said, "We did it." I said, "We did it." We said it like a fact, not a celebration. Because it IS a fact. We did it. Two single mothers with nothing but stubbornness and flashcards and gas station coffee and each other. We did it. The booth should have a plaque. THE TANISHA AND SARAH BOOTH. THEY STUDIED HERE. THEY SURVIVED HERE. THEY BECAME HERE.
My last day at the Waffle House is Friday. Two more shifts. I've been here since I was eighteen. Seven years. Seven years of coffee and hash browns and tips and Mr. Gerald and the break room and the parking lot where I cried and the counter where I served and the apron I put on every morning like armor. Seven years. That's longer than both my relationships combined. The Waffle House has been more reliable than any man I've ever known. I'm going to miss it. I'm going to miss it the way you miss a shelter after the storm passes — with gratitude and relief and the knowledge that you don't need it anymore, but you'll never forget that it was there.
I made a chocolate cake from a box tonight. Not for any occasion — just because the kids deserved cake and I deserved cake and cake is what you make when the counting is almost done. Four days. Four more sleeps. Four more mornings of waking up as a student and going to bed as a student and then one morning — one Friday morning — I'll wake up and I won't be a student anymore. I'll be a graduate. I'll be a dental hygienist. I'll be the woman with the 3.85 and the job in Green Hills and the Payless heels and the cap and gown and the cornbread and the college fund with Mr. Gerald's $100 in it. I'll be Sarah Mitchell. The same one. The better one. Both.
I made that box cake because sometimes you don’t need a reason — you just need the chocolate, the smell of something warm in the oven, and the look on Jayden’s face when he sees it. The next morning I thought: what if breakfast felt like that too? What if I took that same nothing-fancy, everything-feels-right energy and poured it into the waffle iron? Four days out from the biggest morning of my life, we deserved waffles — chocolate ones, made from scratch, eaten in pajamas before the heels and the gown and any of it mattered yet.
Chocolate Waffles
Prep Time: 10 minutes | Cook Time: 20 minutes | Total Time: 30 minutes | Servings: 6 waffles
Ingredients
- 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
- 1/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
- 2 tablespoons granulated sugar
- 2 teaspoons baking powder
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
- 2 large eggs
- 1 3/4 cups buttermilk
- 1/3 cup vegetable oil
- 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
- 1/2 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips (optional, but recommended)
- Powdered sugar, maple syrup, or whipped cream for serving
Instructions
- Preheat the waffle iron. Heat your waffle iron according to the manufacturer’s instructions and lightly grease with nonstick spray or a small amount of butter.
- Mix the dry ingredients. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, cocoa powder, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt until evenly combined.
- Mix the wet ingredients. In a separate bowl or large measuring cup, whisk together the eggs, buttermilk, vegetable oil, and vanilla extract.
- Combine. Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and stir gently until just combined — a few small lumps are fine. Do not overmix. Fold in the chocolate chips if using.
- Cook the waffles. Pour enough batter to fill your waffle iron (roughly 1/2 to 3/4 cup depending on the size). Close the lid and cook until the waffle is set and the edges look crisp, about 4 to 5 minutes. Repeat with remaining batter.
- Serve warm. Dust with powdered sugar, drizzle with maple syrup, or top with whipped cream. Eat them in your pajamas. You’ve earned it.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 340 | Protein: 8g | Fat: 16g | Carbs: 44g | Fiber: 3g | Sodium: 310mg