Slow Cooker Candied Nuts

I told Terrence. On the phone, at 9 PM, after the kids were asleep, with the overhead light on because truths require overhead lights even when delivered through phones. I said: "I'm thinking about starting a catering business." He was quiet for three seconds (I counted — I always count Terrence's silences). Then: "Sarah. Yes. Do it." No hedging. No "are you sure." Just: yes. Do it. The same immediacy as Mama. The two people who know me best both said the same thing: yes. Which means either they're right or they're both crazy. The probability of Lorraine Mitchell AND Terrence both being crazy about the same thing is astronomically low. So they're right. The answer is yes. The answer has always been yes. I've just been afraid to hear it.

Terrence asked: "What will you call it?" I hadn't thought about it. I'd been so focused on the doing that I hadn't named the thing. The naming is important — the naming is what makes the invisible visible, the way naming Elijah made the baby a person and naming Nana made Lorraine a grandmother. Names are power. Names are real. I said: "I don't know yet." He said: "You'll know. The name will come the way Elijah's name came. You'll look at it and you'll know."

Halloween happened. Julia Child, the firefighter, and the pumpkin walked the apartment complex. Chloe carried her cookbook and answered the door question — "What are you?" — with: "Julia Child. She wrote 'Mastering the Art of French Cooking.' Do you want to hear about the beurre blanc?" Nobody wanted to hear about the beurre blanc. Everyone gave candy anyway. The girl got candy and delivered a culinary education. Efficiency.

Jayden's candy haul: personal best. Forty-seven pieces. He counted them twice to confirm. He's seven in March and he already understands inventory management. Diego was with us — matching firefighter costumes, a duo that works with the synchronized efficiency of actual first responders. Two firefighters, one mission: maximum candy.

Elijah, in the pumpkin onesie, was carried by me (he can walk but trick-or-treating requires a pace that exceeds toddler capacity). He pointed at every jack-o-lantern and said: "MINE." He pointed at Jayden's candy and said: "MINE." He pointed at the moon and said: "MINE." The boy has claimed the moon. The toddler's manifest destiny extends to celestial bodies. I respect the ambition.

I made caramel corn — the stovetop kind, Mama's recipe, the Halloween night snack that we eat while sorting candy. The caramel corn is the reward for the adults who walked three children through an apartment complex for ninety minutes and survived. The caramel corn is the adult trick-or-treat. We earned it.

The caramel corn is Mama’s recipe and it belongs to her, but when I first made these slow cooker candied nuts a few years back, I realized they scratch exactly the same itch — that warm, sweet, crunchy reward you crack into while the children are unconscious and the apartment is finally, blessedly quiet. This Halloween, with Terrence’s voice still in my head saying yes, do it, and Elijah’s declaration of dominion over the moon still making me laugh, I needed something in my hands that felt like celebration. These nuts are that. They’re the adult trick-or-treat — you walked three children through an apartment complex for ninety minutes, you earned the bowl.

Prep Time: 10 min | Cook Time: 3 hrs | Total Time: 3 hrs 10 min | Servings: 12

Ingredients

1 lb mixed nuts (pecans, almonds, cashews, walnuts)
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1 large egg white
1 tablespoon water
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
1/2 teaspoon salt

Instructions

Coat the slow cooker. Lightly grease the insert of a 3- or 4-quart slow cooker with nonstick cooking spray.
Make the egg white mixture. In a large bowl, whisk together the egg white, water, and vanilla extract until frothy, about 30 seconds.
Season the nuts. Add the mixed nuts to the bowl and stir to coat evenly with the egg white mixture.
Add the sugar coating. In a small bowl, combine both sugars, cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves, and salt. Pour over the nuts and stir until every nut is well coated.
Load the slow cooker. Transfer the coated nuts to the prepared slow cooker and spread into an even layer.
Cook low and slow. Cover and cook on LOW for 3 hours, stirring every 45 minutes to prevent burning and ensure even caramelization.
Spread and cool. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Spread the hot candied nuts in a single layer and allow to cool completely, about 20 minutes. They will crisp up as they cool.
Break and serve. Once fully cooled, break apart any clusters and transfer to a bowl or airtight container.

Nutrition (per serving)

Slow Cooker Candied Nuts — The Adult Trick-or-Treat We Earned