By Late September. Marcus called on Saturday morning and his voice was doing the thing it does when he's excited and trying not to be — the same voice from April 2016 when he first mentioned Angela, the same voice from June 2017 when he proposed. He said, "Dad, Angela is pregnant." I sat down. Not because I needed to — because the news required a different posture, a lower center of gravity, a closer relationship with the ground that holds everything up.
"When?" I said. "February," he said. February 2020. A baby. A grandchild. A new person made from my son and the woman who makes sweet potato casserole and sets Denise's plate and chose to live near Mama. A new person who will, if God is willing and genetics cooperate, have Marcus's musical ear and Angela's quiet strength and, somewhere deep in the DNA, the stubbornness of Pearlie Mae Johnson, which is the stubbornness that built this family and will sustain it for generations.
I smoked a pork shoulder that afternoon. Not for anyone — just for the doing. The smoke rose into the September sky, and I watched it and thought about the expanding family, about the new branch on the tree, about the baby who will be born into a world that contains my smoker and my wife and my mother and the memory of my daughter, all of it waiting for this new person like a table set for a guest who hasn't arrived yet but whose place is already ready.
That afternoon with the smoker, I wasn’t cooking for anyone in particular—just me and the smoke and the September sky and the news that kept expanding every time I turned it over in my mind. When I came back inside, I wanted something that carried that same weight, that same deep smoky warmth, something you could hold in both hands and feel. These Smoky Gouda & Chicken Sandwiches are as close as a sandwich gets to what a lit smoker means to me—slow flavor, good heat, and the kind of richness that feels like it belongs at a table set for more people than are sitting there yet.
Smoky Gouda & Chicken Sandwiches
Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 20 min | Total Time: 35 min | Servings: 4
Ingredients
- 4 boneless, skinless chicken breast halves (about 6 oz each)
- 1 teaspoon smoked paprika
- 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
- 1/2 teaspoon onion powder
- 1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
- 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
- 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
- 1 tablespoon olive oil
- 4 slices smoked Gouda cheese
- 4 brioche or kaiser sandwich rolls, split and toasted
- 1/3 cup mayonnaise
- 1 tablespoon chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, minced
- 1 teaspoon honey
- 4 leaves green leaf lettuce
- 1 large tomato, sliced
- 1/2 red onion, thinly sliced
Instructions
- Season the chicken. Pat chicken breasts dry. In a small bowl, combine smoked paprika, garlic powder, onion powder, cayenne, salt, and black pepper. Rub the spice mixture evenly over all sides of each chicken breast.
- Make the chipotle mayo. Stir together mayonnaise, minced chipotle peppers, and honey in a small bowl until smooth. Refrigerate until ready to use.
- Sear the chicken. Heat olive oil in a large skillet or grill pan over medium-high heat. Add chicken breasts and cook 6–7 minutes per side, until cooked through and internal temperature reaches 165°F.
- Melt the Gouda. During the last 2 minutes of cooking, lay one slice of smoked Gouda over each chicken breast. Cover the pan with a lid or foil and let the cheese melt fully.
- Toast the rolls. While the chicken rests, place the cut sides of the rolls under the broiler or on the grill pan for 1–2 minutes until lightly golden.
- Assemble the sandwiches. Spread chipotle mayo generously on both cut sides of each toasted roll. Layer with lettuce, a slice of tomato, the Gouda-topped chicken breast, and red onion. Close the roll and serve immediately.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 540 | Protein: 46g | Fat: 22g | Carbs: 38g | Fiber: 2g | Sodium: 780mg